So you’ve bought the sheets, the desk lamp, the shoe racks, the posters that will fall off after two months, the hangers, the towels, the laptop and the notebooks. You pillaged the shit out of your local bedding supply co. and you’re feeling like a champ … or in a cloudy haze of coupons and shopping carts. Same thing. The problem is, there will alwayssss be something you forgot. And you definitely want to get that stuff while your parents’ credit card is just an arm’s length away. Here are some things you would have forgotten if it weren’t for me saving the day…
Not that we blame them. “Breaking Bad” has totally transformed Albuquerque from that random city that’s spelled weird to the meth capital of the world. What else were the great capitalists of New Mexico supposed to do besides squeeze every last penny from their infamous, regionalized crystal? In honor of Walter White and Jesse Pinkman’s “Blue Sky” meth (99.1 percent pure, thankyouverymuch), the good businessmen of the Southwestern city have been selling donuts, bath salts, and candy all in the name of the fictional, highly addictive, and massively illegal drug.
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Did anyone know they were? Apparently rumors were swirling that the former Monica Gellar and and the late-night queen of crass were feuding over Jen Aniston’s upcoming bachelorette party. Well, according to Ms. Handler, who had Jen on “Chelsea Lately” this week to promote her new movie, “We Are The Millers,” she and Courteney barely even know each other. Also, Jen’s totally not even having a bachelorette party. Sorry, gossip magazines — your story was shut down before anyone even knew about it. [The Huffington Post] [Photos: Getty Images]
The results of the first-ever survey of attractiveness from cosmetic facial surgery are in and it’s not pretty. According to The Journal of the American Medical Association, face, brow, and eye-lift patients looked only three years younger with an insignificant increase in attractiveness. How does one measure something so objective, you ask? Isn’t beauty, like, in the eye of the beholder and everything? Apparently not. Or, rather, it’s in the eye of several beholders. Researchers showed 49 patients’ (from the same surgeon) before and after photos to 50 judgmental randos, who told the surveyors how hot and old they thought they looked. On a scale from 1-10 in attractiveness, patients were generally rated between 4 to 6. The completely ego-busting scores could have been due to the patients’ age range of 42 to 73. Said Nancy Etcoff, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School, “They’re looking at a face that looks older in some ways, and younger in some ways. It’s difficult for the raters, and confusing.” Something tells me though that this still won’t derail the millions of Americans who get plastic surgery every year. Hey, at least they didn’t look worse after their facelifts. Small victories, people. [NY Times] [Photo: Getty]
We’ve all been through it — what started off as an innocent movie night with the family becomes a wildly uncomfortable experience the minute a surprisingly racy sex scene fills the screen. Let’s relive all the awkwardness — in GIFs — after the jump…
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As an anthropology major in college, I was exposed to a wide variation of human behavior and culture. But nothing, nothing could have prepared me to watch a two minute clip of a Justin Bieber concert. With raised eyebrows and pursed lips I desperately tried to understand this strange subculture of screeching tweens raising iPhones to record the singer clad in sagging leather pants, fingerless red gloves, and a shiny sleeveless hoodie. Keep reading »