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Today in our “Dating Don’ts” column, Judy McGuire gave some tips on how NOT to act on a first date if you don’t want your companion runnin’ for the hills. But we decided that there must be things guys shouldn’t do on a first date either that set women off. We decided to ask the women on our IM (yes, they’re there!) what would turn them off on a first date. Their responses, after the jump…

Lord knows that there are a lot of wacky people running out there, and for some annoying reason women get slammed (unfairly, if you ask me) with the crazy card more often than men. However, sometimes (not often, but sometimes) maybe the name-callers have a point. Some of us can be kind of kooky. I’m not talking about whimsically cute eccentricities; I’m speaking of full-on lunatic behavior.

Maybe you’ve been labeled a little odd or a tad touched. No shame in that—hey, let she without issues cast the first stone—but most likely you don’t want your sanity shortcomings to be the first impression you make upon a new date. For this reason, you should, at all costs, avoid going down the following roads for at least the first three dates:

• “My therapist says. . .” Unless he’s your full-on boyfriend, beginning any sentence with those three words will cause a man to make a mad dash for the hills. Yes, even if he’s in therapy himself. At worst, he’ll think you’re crazy; at best, he’ll think you’re the type of gal who’s going to require a lot of “talks.” Neither impression bodes well for your future relationship.

“I want to start role-playing—how do I incorporate that into my regular sex life with my boyfriend since neither one of us has tried it before and want to start slow?”—Acting Up In Bed, via email

I think there’s two kinds of role-playing: theatrical and emotional. For example, the theatrical would be the two of you dressing up like a nurse and patient and pretending to do it on the operating table. For emotional, you would pretend to be a hooker and your boyfriend a John. Instead of costumes, you focus on the emotional side of the fantasy.

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The weekend’s finally here!  And in the summer time, that can only mean one thing, it’s time to put on your bathing suit and hit the beach, pool, backyard, hood of a car…whatevs, you’re getting into a swatch of spandex and it’s time to show off!  How to look your best in a bikini may seem like an existential crisis, forcing you to question everything from your food intake to how deep you need to go into the water.  But we’ve distilled down the strutting your stuff essentials into a few easy steps so you can step out and confidently show some skin!

1. Ooze with Attitude Be confident and casual—that’s always sexy. If you know you look good, so does everyone else.

Leo (July 23-August 22)
All that saving for a rainy day comes to an end today, when you just say, “F’ it,” and throw the self-discipline out the door. Whatever you’ve been holding yourself back on, thinking it’s good for you, just isn’t. Extravagance, flamboyance and absolute drama are your thing and without it, you aren’t really being you. Don’t deny your destiny!

It’s almost August 1…which means a couple things. One, I need to return that skirt I just bought or I’ll be broke at rent time. And two, leases are coming to an end, which means more and more couples will take the plunge and move in with each other.

As someone who just took the plunge and moved in with her boyfriend for the first time, I can tell you it’s everything it’s cracked up to be. It’s fun, convenient, cost-effective, and the next logical step in our relationship. But how are you supposed to know when it’s the right time?

Locking lips. Making out. Smooching. Kissing. It sounds so pleasant and easy, yet do a little research and you’ll soon discover that while everyone may be doing it, few are doing it well. For your edification, I have rounded up the different varieties of bad kissers and broken them down by the traits they share with members of the animal kingdom: 

Iguana: Characterized by cool, dry lips, and a tiny pink tongue, Lizard Lips is about as arousing as, well, a small reptile crawling around your mouth. One victim noted, “He’d dart his tongue in and out at a million flicks per second. Kissing is supposed to get you hot, not give you calluses.”

“Should I be worried that my boyfriend has been secretly watching Internet porn?”—Dating Mr. Skin Flick, via email

Internet porn for guys is like sex for our parents…they all do it, we just don’t want to think about it (and they don’t like to admit it).

A healthy amount of porn for guys OR girls is absolutely nothing to be worried about. If your boyfriend secretly watches porn it doesn’t mean he’s “cheating” on you. It just means that your guy is average, and falls into the statistic that guys think about sex every seven seconds. He also probably feels a little embarrassed that he does it. This is all totally normal.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)
If you truly mean what you say, then put your money where your mouth is. Whatever the sitch with your man of the hour, you’re going to have to step it up. It’s time to take the trip together or meet the family. Yes, it’s do or die time and whichever that next step, invest into it and make it the moment perfect. The dividends returned will be worth your while.

The unholy trinity of Photoshop, spell check and the Internet mean that even the most illiterate, personality-deficient, hideous troll can land a first date, much to a lady’s disappointment. Landing a second date is the tricky bit, so when you realize you’d like to never see this guy again, there are some tried and true strategies to assure that he decides the first date is also the last.

“The guy I’m dating is seriously under-endowed. Is this a total deal-breaker?”—Dick-appointed, via email

Have you had sex already? If you have, then you know the answer better than I do. Just ask yourself this: Was it good?

When women experience orgasms during sex, it usually has nothing to do with how far in a penis goes or how wide. Most women’s orgasms are clitoral, and are achieved when pressure from the man’s pelvic bone rubs against her. The G-spot (which needs to be stimulated in order for a vaginal orgasm to be achieved) doesn’t exist in every woman, but those who do have it can reach it with their finger. I don’t know when the last time you measured your finger was (I measure mine all the time), but it’s not that long. Get my drift?

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As Erin already pointed out, there will be some point in your career as a twentysomething when someone will break your heart. There’s also a chance you’ll break someone’s heart. Either way, there’s a good chance that someone will be your roommate, making cutting ties an even bigger bitch than usual. Here are the dos and don’ts of breaking up with your live-in boyfriend from girls who’ve done it. 

Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Unless you’re with a psycho, no person is going to be upfront about every little detail of their past. No matter how healthy your relationship, there are always going to be secrets. So, while your paranoia starts to get you hot under the collar, redirect it towards something more productive — like other oral fixations. Besides, would you want to reveal all your skeletons?

As any savvy online dater knows, you can spend hours crafting the perfect combination of wit, sophistication, and charm, but all your pretty words won’t mean squat if your photo reeks.

That’s not to say that you need to be a ringer for Angelina or J. Lo to get any play (though obviously that wouldn’t be a hindrance), but you do need to have a photo that shows you in the best possible light without it being a completely misleading deception. 

“My girlfriend has Vaginismus. We have a great relationship and we hook up orally and with hands a good amount. Unfortunately, because of her condition, we can’t have sex because it is really painful for her. Obviously I am never going to push it on her because it is WAY harder for her than it is for me. But I’m still a guy and I can’t help wanting to do it. Fortunately, she’s in physical therapy for it now. My question is, how likely is it that she will get better, at least to the point of being able to have sex comfortably?”—Concerned Boyfriend, via email

If you ever want to imagine what Vaginismus is like, have a friend pretend to poke you in the eye. Know what happens? Your eye suddenly closes as the object gets closer. In the case of your girlfriend, your penis is the “poker”, and her vagina is the “eye.” Sooo not fun.

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Even though I have tried to wear perfume (Coco Chanel once said, “A woman who doesn’t wear perfume has no future."), scents seem to fall off my skin, and I have basically given up on smelling nice. Perfume blog The Fragrance Fanatic just posted some tips for making your perfume or eau de toilette stay put, but the whole process seems a little too product- and time-intensive to incorporate into my morning routine.

Cancer (June 21-July 22)
A more spontaneous you will be out and ready to party like it’s 2999. Let your impetuous tastes lead you were they may, even despite the fact that your mind will be reeling from the pace. Sure, you’ll have lots of paranoias to deal with as you live it up, but as long as you can justify your time by being happy, does anything else really matter?

Carla Genender, the author of DogSense says you should great your significant other the way you would your dog—by acting overjoyed. “Show you’re glad to see her, even if she’s only been gone five minutes,” Carla writes in the book Dogsense, which features 99 tips on caring, affection, communication, acceptance, and appreciation that people can learn from dogs. Think “lick and/or hump people when you get excited” is one of them? [KIROTV.com]

When I was in college, I had a gay boyfriend. No, he wasn’t my queeny bestie who helped me match my purse with my shoes and went clubbing with me; he was my actual boyfriend—we had sex, I met his parents, the whole deal. To be fair, I didn’t know he was gay. He didn’t act like it, and even though all of his best friends were campy and out ‘n’ proud, I just thought he was an enlightened dude who didn’t care about their sexual orientation. I knew his gay best friend was in love with him, and hated me because we were dating, but I was secure enough to just deal with it and all the bitchy glares he threw my way whenever I showed up at bars or parties. This went on for about a year, and while the GB and I had a somewhat rocky relationship, I ultimately thought we were in love, and really, quite the adorable couple. 

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Welcome to “He Wants To Know”, an advice column where YOU get to play Dear Abby. Every once and a while we’ll feature a question from a guy and we, with your help, will do our best to answer it. And guys, if you have a question, send it to us at tips@thefrisky.com.

Question: This weekend I slept with one of my buddy’s good friends. I haven’t told him yet. He told me she was bad news and I should stay away, but clearly I didn’t listen. I am not really sure how to tell him that I smeared his friend six ways from Sunday without damaging the friendship. What does The Frisky say? Do I reveal my sextivity to him or try and keep it under raps? Clearly I feel guilty...Help!—Sneaking Around, via email

The Frisky’s Answer: Umm, why does the dude care who you sleep with? Is she an ex-girlfriend? Someone he wants to get with? Because if not, it makes zero sense why he would give a crap that you “smeared her” unless of course he would just be weirded out that you hid the juicy details. Anyway, if you really think your friend needs to know, tell him, but don’t feel any guilt. Homeboy needs to GROW UP. 

Cancer (June 21-July 22)
If you don’t act selfishly this week, you’re doing a great disservice to yourself. With the sun entering Cancer, this is your time to make outrageous demands and have the extra energy to enforce them. The only drawback is your idealism won’t be so stellar. Luckily, this throe of power will help you fight that feeling, making you feel like the loud mouth top you should be.

Gemini (May 21- June 20)
Your light-hearted and jovial attitude is your selling point. However, when you find yourself falling, you seem to switch into acting detached rather than wildly in love. This will cause a problem. This week, there’s a full moon in your partnership house, which means time to cut out this bad habit. Even if it’s not your size, do try to wear your heart on your sleeve.

“Can a woman get cervical cancer if a smoker routinely goes down on her?”—Paranoid About My Puffer, Houston, TX

There hasn’t been any real medical research to support this claim, but you’re not totally crazy. If I had to take a guess, I’d say having a smoker go down on you is like putting Equal in your coffee. It’s not awesome for you, but if you don’t eat eight bathtubs full of it a day you’ll be fine.

“How can my husband and I mess around when I’m on my period? I’m a little squeamish about it, but he doesn’t