The best sexting apps for getting your long distance freak on

You know that children’s book If You Give A Mouse A Cookie? Well, if you give horny people technology, there’s only one sure-as-hell thing they’re going to do with it: try to get laid. Luckily, there are apps for that, too. The best sexting apps take secret messaging to the next level and let you try to woo (or just send and receive pictures of hot bods) someone without getting blown up, Anthony Weiner-style.

There is nothing to be ashamed of if you like your foreplay to be telephonic. More than that, though, sexting is a really fun activity if you’re too lazy to go out and get the real thing, but still want to spice up your night. The most experienced sexters know that G-Chat, iMessages, and Twitter DMs are probably not the most secure; and while I hate to encourage straight up infidelity, I also hate to encourage snooping, and apps are the best way to keep your sexting activity on the DL and buried deep within your phone’s home screen. Remember to sign out of the app when you’re done, though, to keep prying eyes out of your extracurricular activities.

Talking dirty can obviously be fun, but it requires a little imagination. Practicing your sexting game on these apps is definitely necessary.

Wickr

Wickr is a lesser known app that you might want to move your Tinder messages to if you want to talk dirty on the sly. The messages self-destruct and are totally encrypted. If you want to get serious about sexting, this is your app.

WhatsApp

WhatsApp is great for when you travel and need to rehash the hot sex you had while on vacation overseas and keep the fun going. It’s the cheapest way to connect with your international lovah.

FaceTime

Seriously, the word FaceTime even sounds dirty if you have the right sense of humor. It might not be technically for sexting, but if you can find a way to position your phone or laptop screen properly, you can take your video chats to a whole new level. There are also alternatives for Android users.

Housetab

Finally, a way to chat with people and get them to pay for your drinks at the bar. This app lets you open a tab at a bar and buy other people drinks. The creep factor can be high, so stay smart. Maybe just buy your own drinks and say things via the app that you might not have the guts to say in-person. The chances of taking them home and getting what you want are much higher than with whatever banter you would be making at the bar.

Kik

https://twitter.com/Kik/status/780492141520908288

Kik gets billed as an app for teens who just like to send emoji and pictures, but it’s also good for sexting. The best part is you don’t have to use your actual phone number or name, so you can stay as anonymous as you like.

Sexting in-app is always a good time. But remember that screenshots are still a real thing, so maybe don’t send anything you wouldn’t want the whole world to know about later.