Kim Kardashian sues one celeb gossip site over claims she lied about Paris robbery

It is a truth universally acknowledged by dickheads that as soon as a woman reports suffering a traumatic attack, she must be accused of making it up. No surprise then that, according to reports by TMZ, Kim Kardashian is suing over claims she faked her robbery. More specifically, she’s filing a lawsuit against celebrity gossip website MediaTakeOut for posts suggesting she staged the whole ordeal in her Paris apartment.

The posts don’t leave MediaTakeOut much wiggle room; a particularly illustrative one starts out, “It’s Been LESS THAN A WEEK Since Kim Kardashian Was ALLEGEDLY Robbed…” (Side note: MediaTakeOut appears to be where tabloid newspapers’ overused ellipses and caps lock go to die, so every post sounds like it’s being narrated by a very shouty, yet very hesitant, person.) MediaTakeOut hasn’t commented on the reported lawsuit.

Of course, other celeb tabloid sites aren’t totally innocent of playing into the “Kardashian faked her robbery” story. While they wouldn’t go so far as to caps-lock potentially litigious terms, other sites did a fair share of hinting that Kardashian’s robbery was less than genuine. In TMZ’s latest post on the situation, it described the robbers’ cop disguises as looking “like they came from a Halloween store” and all but openly stated that she couldn’t have guessed what they were talking about since “the robbers only spoke French.”

Kim Kardashian
CREDIT: JB Lacroix/Getty Images

This wording pulls off two neat tricks. First, it implies Kardashian should have realized the robbers were in disguise, after which she could then fight off several men carrying firearms with the secret MMA skills this scenario presupposes she has. Her failure to spot the fake uniforms means a) either the robbery was equally fake or b) she deserved to be victimized, neither of which acknowledge the trauma she went through. Remember, ladies: if you dare to become successful, anything bad that happens to you is somehow your fault.

Second, that wording positions Kardashian as the sole human being to whom the rules of sociolinguistics no longer apply, which is an impressive feat for a celebrity gossip site. Many people would think she could’ve hazarded a guess as to what French-speaking robbers were talking about while they were in the process of robbing her. But TMZ knows: she has ascended beyond reliance on social context or body language to a plane of communication where the spoken utterance is all.

The victim-blaming attitude toward Kardashian is a pile of misogyny that needs to be flushed down the toilet with the rest of the crap. Only time will tell if she gets a legal apology from at least one site.