LAPD confirms Brad Pitt is not being investigated for child abuse, thank god

Thinking the Brangelina divorce scandal couldn’t get any worse, fans were horrified by numerous reports Thursday morning claiming Brad Pitt was being investigated by the LAPD for child abuse. But here’s some good news: Pitt actually isn’t being invested by the police for child abuse, and we can all go back to just being upset about their divorce. “The LAPD is not handling any reports or allegations into child abuse for Mr. Brad Pitt,” the LAPD’s public information officer told ET Thursday.

The scandal arose after People reported that an anonymous tip had been made to the Department of Child and Family Services regarding an alleged altercation from last week. TMZ alleged Pitt went into a drunken rage on an airplane, but the L.A. County Department of Children and Family Services told ET it isn’t about to confirm, deny, or disclose anything: “We have very strict confidentiality laws and the laws do not allow us to confirm or deny the subjects of our investigations.”

The couple announced their split Tuesday, but nearly everything remains speculation, from why they’re getting a divorce (since alleged “other woman” Marion Cotillard and her husband are presently expecting their second child), to how custody agreements will work, to whether or not love is even real.