No, David Bowie’s ashes were not scattered at Burning Man, you fucking plebes

David Bowie was important to so many people that it’s somewhat understandable that fans want to lay to claim to him. But, sorry, you crazy hippies: David Bowie’s ashes were not scattered at Burning Man. No offense to the festival or its attendees, but that would be so lame. Sorry, it would be. Bowie himself would probably never even admit that to someone who loved dancing around in the desert and taking hallucinatory drugs because he is a sweet, sweet angel. But Bowie was a little classier and more outlandish than Burning Man. In fact, according to his will filed with the state of New York, he asked that his wife Iman, family and friends take his remains to Bali and have him cremated there, in accordance with Buddhist ritual, and scatter them there.

Bowie was so kind though he realized that that might not be possible. He adds in the will that if taking the body all the way to Bali isn’t practical, they can cremate him and scatter him in Bali. According to reports, Bowie was cremated in New Jersey on January 12, 2015, but it’s unknown whether the executors have organized a trip to Bali to scatter them. But Bowie’s wishes for his body were clearly stated in his will, so it’s weird that there’s any debate at all about where his ashes will be scattered.

E! News originally reported that over Labor Day, Iman had given Bowie’s godchild, David, permission to take the remains to the music festival in Nevada, where the artist was being honored with a huge statue. A source to E!, “David’s godchild and David had long talks about Burning Man and what it stands for, and David loved the message behind it.” Meh — that sounds like a good way to drum up excitement for the festival more than anything else.

Bowie’s son, Duncan Jones, tweeted that those claims were a little gross. He wrote, “That Burning Man thing? What people will do & say for attention never ceases to amaze me. Not true. Kind of a gross claim as well. *sigh*”  The 45-year-old also tweeted that if his father did want his ashes scattered in public, in front of strangers, it would be at Skegness Butlins, a resort in Lincolnshire, England. Which, judging by the looks of the picture Jones added to the tweet, looks like an awesome place to visit in the name of David Bowie.

So there aren’t any reports of Jones and Iman and the rest of the family going to Bali for Bowie, but it’s likely that if they did, they would have worked to keep it under wraps. Or they’re waiting — there’s warm, tropical weather in Bali year round, but the spring and summer months are high season over there, which would have been right after his death anyway. It’s possible they’re waiting for the end of September when it clears out and they can have a private (most likely abso-freaking-lutely beautiful) moment and do right by him.

Sorry, Burning Men. At least you still have Paris Hilton.