Kylie Jenner’s New Eyeshadow Kit, KyShadow, Has Her Fans Losing Their Minds Despite Its Ridiculous-Ass Name
In case you needed further proof that Kylie Jenner will constantly be making more money than any of us mere peasants could ever possibly conceive of, Kylie Jenner has released her own eye-shadow line absurdly named KyShadow. She made the monumental announcement on her website this morning in a video that likely had Kardashian and make-up fans alike drooling lustfully at their computers as she emotionally prepared for loads of fresh cash.
She wrote on the website:
“Surprise, I’m launching a KyShadow palette!!! I’ve been working on this for months and I’m so excited to finally reveal the big news to you guys. Check out this exclusive video of me introducing my new eyeshadow palette – and then watch Ariel Tejado my glam with it!
The video showcases some of the shades of the palette which include many neutral browns and tans with gem-inspired color names such as Quartz, Topaz, Hematite, Tiger’s Eye, Goldstone, Jasper and Citrine. The palette itself is appropriately named “The Bronze Palette,” which likely both refers to the color scheme as well as the heaps of glistening bronze that Jenner rolls in every morning before carefully applying her 10-pounds of perfectly proportioned cosmetics.
“I’ve been using this every day for the past 5-6 months,” Jenner revealed in what marks one of the more groundbreaking celebrity news moments of the past few months.
As you can imagine, Jenner fans were overjoyed at the announcement with many of them surprised they hadn’t picked up on her past six months of stealthily wearing her eyeshadow in videos and during public appearances.
There’s no doubt that the widespread popularity of Jenner’s lip kit has helped hype the announcement of the obnoxiously named KyShadow. The buzz spread by Jenner’s popular lip kit was so vibrant it included a confusing promotional video that featured a possible drug exchange and a notable dose of Louis Vuitton.
We can only hope and pray that the forthcoming KyShadow related videos incorporate the same amount of confusing creativity and vague odes to a lush drug-fueled lifestyle. Because as exciting as this announcement video may be for some, if there’s anything the people have learned to expect and desire from a business-oriented Kardashian, it’s dramatic publicity stunts.
Hopefully, Jenner has learned from her past oversights of employee treatment and labor laws, and her eyeshadow kit isn’t being produced in the same underpaid sweatshop environment as her lip kit. My fingers aren’t crossed, but still, get yours, girl.