The Backstreet Boys Are Releasing A New Album, Which Is So Very Sad

Beyoncé and Kanye can’t have all of the fun when it comes to releasing new music. Everyone deserves a chance, I guess, but that doesn’t mean the Backstreet Boys releasing a new album isn’t just the saddest little thing I’ve ever heard. (Sidenote: how I made it this far without a “Backstreet’s back” joke is beyond me. This does not count.) Yes, the ’90s boyband announced on Instagram Tuesday that they are in the studio recording a new album, and it’s coming out in August. Brian Littrell wrote that they’re doing something they’ve “never done before” with FGL, who could possibly be the Florida Georgia Line, a country music duo.

So, this is probably the worst idea ever, guys. I honest to goodness thought the last new music from the group was sometime when Delia’s was still in business and my crush had a bowl cut, but apparently the band (if we can even call them that) released an album in 2013 called In a World Like This. Yes, we live in a world where grown men reunite to live their glory days and no one cares because no one ever cared and One Direction isn’t even together anymore. Justin Bieber is a total toolbag and even he could take BSB. Let’s leave irrelevant pop music from the ’90s where it belongs — buried in our iTunes, files renamed so no one knows we actually own the Backstreet Boys (or is that just me?).

I guess it’s cute that they keep trying and are still friends, but the most recent thing they’ve done is Dead 7, a zombie movie featuring members of the band and everyone from your Teen Beat dreams, with members of other boy bands like ‘Nsync, 98 Degrees (my personal favorite), and O Town. I mean, that’s funny. A new country album is not. It just makes me feel so very sad.

Even more sad? Nick Carter recently confirmed that the group is trying out a Las Vegas residency. “We have a deal with Live Nation, the touring company, and we just signed a nine-show deal to do a test run in Vegas with a residency, so that’s definitely going to happen, but we’re going to do a trial run first,” he told Entertainment Weekly. Yeah, guys, you might want to try that shit out first and see how it goes.

Jennifer Lopez, Britney Spears, and Mariah Carey have also done test runs in Vegas to resuscitate their careers if that gives you any idea of how this one might go. Pour one out for the little boy band that could.