L.A.’s Glass Slide Off A Skyscraper Would Be Cool If It Weren’t So Terrifying

As a life-long East Coaster, I have never seen any reason to visit or live in Los Angeles, and the new massive glass slide from an L.A. skyscraper is now definitely one more thing on my “con” list (along with cars and bikini bodies). Because I am a wimp. I spend most of my time in New York City 20-floor offices just trying to remember to breathe and look for fire exits, but if pummeling 1,000 feet to the ground in a glass tube is the kind of thing you’re into, I am not judging one bit.

Go for it and more power to you. The slide is on the U.S. Bank building and is open to the public, who can ride 45 feet from the 70th floor to the 69th. So, it’s not a complete free fall, but it’s pretty fucking insane, if you ask me. I feel like we’re asking for trouble (*knocks on wood and says a little prayer*).

The “chute” is made of 1-1/4-inch thick glass — again 1,000 feet above street level — and according to ABC News, “guests sit on a rug that’s wrapped around their knees to reduce friction and gain incredible speed.” Jesusmaryandjoseph, as my grandmother would say.

https://twitter.com/jessica_roy/status/746043999450894336?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw

According to The Los Angeles Times, which was able to send a reporter to try the slide out before it was open to the public (I hope that reporter has healthcare), it’s actually just a seconds-long ride, and many riders were asking for second or third tries. But, quite frankly, that’s seconds more than anyone needs to be that far above ground, wrapped in a rug, pummeling through a glass chute. You crazy motherfuckers.

 

For the moment, the U.S. Bank building in the City of Angels is the tallest skyscraper in the western U.S., and was acquired by OUE Ltd in 2013. They decided to make the 70th floor of the building The Skyspace, with an observation deck that wraps around the entire floor, and thought about features like bungee jumping, zip lines, and other panic-inducing features. Lucy Rumantir, the president and chief executive of OUE for the Americas told The L.A. Times, “We said, ‘We have to do something that doesn’t exist anywhere else.'”

Apparently, according to Rumantir, it’s incredibly safe and could hold an entire school bus full of people, but I have my doubts. Tickets just to get on The Skyspace floor cost $25 for adults, $22 for seniors, and $19 for kids ages 3-12, and a ride on the slide is $8 extra. There is also a cafe with booze, which is the only way anyone would be able to get me near the thing.

Go forth tourists and insanely brave humans — and send Vines from the ride, because I’m secretly jealous I’m too scared to take the ride.