A Tennessee Congressional Candidate Wants To “Make America White Again” And 9 Other People You Could Vote For, I Guess

Do you ever find yourself wondering who in their right mind would vote for presumptive Republican nominee Donald Trump? Well, I got one — a U.S. House candidate from Tennessee, Rick Tyler, wants to “Make America White Again,” with a billboard he put up with that very slogan on the side of the highway. He was forced to take it down after extreme backlash, but gosh darnit, he believes in it. “A majority of the people in county like it,” he told a local Polk County NBC affiliate. Oh, I bet they do.

Tyler says he’s not a racist, he just wants to go back to “1960s, Ozzie and Harriet, Leave it to Beaver time when there were no break-ins, no violent crime, no mass immigration.” Let’s not even try to talk to Tyler about where he came from and how boats and mass immigration worked, but maybe how we had Jim Crows laws up until 1967. Yeah, make America great (and white) again. That’s the thing with people like Tyler: they are completely freaking delusional, sort of like Trump himself. America doesn’t need to be made great “again,” but it does need to keep getting better. Making America “white” is not the way to do that.

Just in case you believe in “simpler” or stupider times, there are some really terrible candidates you could vote for this year.

Republican Lee Zeldin of New York

He thinks President Obama and the whole Democratic party are all racists. Right.

Republican Diane Black of Tennessee

She is the sponsor (yes, someone with a VAGINA is the sponsor) of the bill to defund Planned Parenthood because the “big abortion industry” is taking over America. The NRA just endorsed her for reelection. You can go throw up now.

Republican Trent Franks of Arizona

Trent Franks is the kind of asshole who thinks the rate of pregnancies from rape are “very low.” He works hard on foster care, which is fine and good, but it’s not to make the system better — it’s because he thinks abortion is wrong.

Republican Mark Sanford of South Carolina 

It’s not just that back in 2009 Mark Sanford ran away with his Argentine lover to South America and let people (including his wife) think he was missing, or even that he then lied about it, but now that he’s back and reelected, he’s the kind of guy that hangs out with the Duck Dynasty crew. And thinks he’s “wise.”

Republican Robert Pittenger of North Carolina

Even though the federal government has told North Carolina it’s unconstitutional, Robert Pittenger still backs the state’s discriminatory transgender bathroom law, even when other politicians have come around on the issue in light of the lawsuits. He thinks transgender individuals “hurt people.”

Republican Steve King of Iowa

He backed Ted Cruz and said God would use the candidate to restore light to America. He is batshit crazy. He also thinks it’s racist to put Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill.

Republican Ann Wagner of Missouri

Ann Wagner is the kind of woman who makes you tilt your head and wonder, “Why don’t you care about women?,” as she defunds Planned Parenthood. She also doesn’t like black or brown people coming into America. This week, she rejoiced about the Supreme Court decision blocking Obama’s immigration executive action. It just spirals from there.

Republican Steve Chabot of Ohio

I will make no joke about Steve Chabot’s wedding photo, but there are so many to be made. Just look at his Twitter timeline and how much money the NRA has given him and you will have seen enough.

Republican Doug LaMalfa of California

Doug LaMalfa thinks all refugees are terrorists — enough said.

Unfortunately, the list of electable representatives that are also assholes could go on forever. Just pay attention to policies — fighting for stupid bills, being scared to tackle big issues, or taking too much money from big banks is one thing, but actively fighting against civil rights is a whole different story.