This Seven-Year-Old Drops Some Major Truth Bombs And Just Gets Life

Like a lot of kids, seven-year-old Bea Oxford asks a lot of questions and has a lot of unfiltered thoughts. Unlike a lot of kids, she’s now a Twitter celebrity thanks of her mother’s tweets quoting the wise words that come out of her mouth. Her mom, author Kelly Oxford, frequently tweets about Bea’s hilarious and strange utterances regarding the secret muffin-cupcake war, why she’s looking forward to the apocalypse, and much more.

Children being quoted online as saying funny/insightful/messed-up things is hardly a new phenomenon, but it’s always nice when their ranks get updated. Bea is the latest member of the Hilarious Kid Twitter Club, where parents tweet about funny things said by their kids and are rewarded with favorites and retweets. Other recent members include the daughters of James Breakwell (Twitter alias Exploding Unicorn); these girls would rather forgo CPR and die than get kissed, want to know whether Dad dying means they can have his stuff, and don’t want to have a baby when they grow up because the stomach is “where I put my candy.” With kid quotes like these populating Twitter, Bea’s pithy sayings are in good company.

However, doubts have arisen regarding the veracity of the Bea tweets. This is partially because some of them seem a bit adult, as they deal with subjects such as the sex lives of Survivor contestants and choosing to smoke weed over going to heaven. But before you call “FAKE,” as many on the internet are inevitably inclined to do, remember what kids are actually like.

I don’t have kids myself, but I worked with a lot of them at my last job, and as my age increases, so do my interactions with peers who have children. Based on these experiences, I can tell you that children are extremely and delightfully weird.

The great thing about Bea is that on top of being extremely weird and funny, she also speaks for all of us. For instance, when she asked her mom if women get their periods on the weekends too (distressed by the thought for obvious reasons) and her mom informed her that, yes, sadly they do, Bea muttered: “Jesus Christ.” My feelings exactly, girl.

So, before you call “fake,” put down that glass of haterade. Instead, try believing that there are perceptive, shameless (in the best way), intelligent children whose personalities lead them to say awesome things, and that Bea is one of them. She’s actually cooler than most adults, so I’m a fan.