The Spice Girls Will Reportedly Hold Tryouts For Their Reunion Tour, So Get Your Best Song Ready
For many ’80s and ’90s kids, childhood aspirations included some combination of being a fireman, astronaut, veterinarian (you just get to pet cats, right?!), ballerina, and lastly and most importantly, a Spice Girl. For those of you who have clung to a glimmering sliver of hope, your chance is here — the Spice Girls are doing a reunion tour and they’re holding OPEN TRYOUTS to replace Sporty and Posh.
Before you get sad or conspiratorial about the fact that they’re replacing two of their members — Posh (otherwise known as Victoria Beckham) and Sporty (Melanie Chisholm) decided to deck out on their own accord, after being invited to join the rest of the crew for their 20th reunion tour. Obviously it’s a bummer that the whole crew won’t be back in their full sparkling glory, but now you might have the opportunity to join them, and honestly, what else could you possibly hope for?
While they haven’t released an official announcement for tryouts yet, a recent write-up in Life & Style magazine revealed their tentative plan to have eager women of the world attempt to fill the void left by Posh and Sporty. “The Spice Girls’ 20th reunion tour hit a bit of a snag when Victoria Beckham (Posh Spice) and Melanie Chisholm (Sporty Spice) both decided not to participate — but sources tell Life & Style that rather than cancel the tour, the rest of the group decided to find two ladies to replace them,” the magazine reports.
An anonymous source told Life & Style: “The girls are going to be making a formal announcement about tryouts for their spots in the next few weeks. Posh and Sporty can be replaced.” You heard the call — it’s officially time to get out your sparkliest crop top and hone your choreography to Spice Up Your Life so you can live out your childhood dreams.
Without the formal announcement, I am extremely curious what their tryout process will entail. Will the Spice Girls themselves watch all the clamoring fans pour their hearts out in song and dance, or will there by multiple levels of screening? Will this happen across many cities or be held in one city? What do they want from us, and how do we all collectively achieve Spice Girl status?! These are serious questions we need answered ASAP.
I am posting these songs here so you can start practicing your routine, because I believe in you and your dreams.
Do you understand the stakes here? Are you ready to prove that what Victoria Beckham now lacks in Spice Girls luster, you can more than make up for?
I sure hope so, because if anything, this is exactly what the country needs right now (besides gun reform, but you know).