‘Orange Is The New Black’ Season 4 Hits Netflix Tonight, So Cancel All Your Plans

The Litchfield ladies are back. If you’ve been biting your nails ever since season three ended last year, rest easy, because season four of Orange Is The New Black airs on Netflix tonight. Cancel your plans so I can rely on the entire internet to discuss it with me. Consider this your mitzvah for the day. Unfortunately, if you live on the East Coast, it drops at 3 a.m. ET, so set your alarm now. Forget the fact that you have school or work tomorrow — OITNB is totally worth cashing in a sick day to binge watch Netflix for 10 straight hours.

Jenji Kohan’s Netflix original is based off Piper Kerman’s riveting, heart-wrenching 2010 memoir set in a women’s prison that has since become a TV institution. The trailer prompting an internet ~frenzy~ in anticipation for this season is a healthy dose of humor, sexual tension, and Don’t Fucking Mess With Me vibes. It starts with Cindy telling Poussey, “Look at Obama: he got to be president, so now the rest of us get to be in…” “Prison!,” Crazy Eyes chimes in (though can we talk about how ableist her prison name is? I much prefer Suzanne Warren, a name that’s as deep and soulful we learn she truly can be). There will be 100 new inmates moving into the penitentiary, which means 100 new opportunities for cat fights, tears, and fucking with the new overly innocent guards.

In the trailer, Piper begins her white-girl-pity-me rant with “I’ve been in Litchfield for a while now, and I’m beginning to feel unsafe.” It’s hard for me to sympathize with a character who, over the course of the last three seasons, grew progressively more ruthless. Then again, I’d probably be a hateful shell of who I once was if I was locked away in a cell all day with nothing but my emotions too.

As the quintessential antihero, her decline started when she downplayed to her husband just how deep she got into her role as not-so-secret-lover Alex Vause’s drug mule (Larry’s puppy eyes broke my cold, dead heart, evoking all the times I was mean to my Nice Jewish Boyfriends, so I was cheering my face off when he later found love in a more hopeful place).

Deadline is calling the new series “fresh and binge-worthy,” which is totally unfair because it confirms something we already know. If you need me for the next 24 hours, I will be nose deep in my laptop, probably weeping, crying, and yelling all at the same time. Why? Well, the series relies heavily on sophisticated character development, which is why we rooted so hard for Pennsatucky in the wake of getting raped by a prison guard, we hope like hell transgender inmate Sophia manages to regain the trust of her son, and mostly, even though the inmates tend to do Very Bad Things, we want them so desperately to prevail.

According to a survey Netflix sent Vanity Fair, the show is one of the most re-watched series in pretty much the history of ever. Twenty-nine percent of respondents watched it for the inherent pleasure in it, a quarter wanted to go back and spot any forthcoming hints, and another quarter? OINTB just rocks, need they say more? (I was never a math whiz, but seems like we’re missing data on why the remaining 21 percent relived the series. I. Need. To. Know.)

Happy binging, friends.