Hexing Stanford Rapist Brock Turner Is Not The Answer, Though It Is Mildly Amusing

Listen, I don’t like Brock Turner (or any rapist) as much as the next gal, but hexing Brock Turner is not the way to go, ladies. Tuesday night, hundreds of witches organized by Melanie Elizabeth Hexen of Iowa gathered together to put a spell on Turner. Through a Facebook event, Hexen called for a mass hexing and within minutes over 600 people had RSVP’d “hell yes.”

If you couldn’t make it to last week’s event, Hexen recommends reciting this little diddy three times over to really get at Turner good:

Brock Allen Turner we hex you. You will be impotent. You will know constant pain of pine needles in your guts. Food will bring you no sustenance. In water, your lungs will fail you. Sleep will only bring nightmares. Shame will be your mantle. You will meet justice. My witchcraft is strong. Our witchcraft is powerful. The spell will work. So Mote it be.

Now, I respect Wiccans and witchcraft (please don’t hex me) and the idea of a higher power that would be alright with just adding “the spell will work” after things to make them happen, but I’m not sure that mass hexings are the way to go about getting justice for victims of sexual assault. And aren’t practicing Wiccans supposed to “do no harm?” I think these Facebook hexers missed something.

There are a few problems with this, the least of which is that you have to break out a black candle and an image of Turner. Seriously, who the hell wants to keep looking at that kid’s face? I sure as hell don’t, but a spell wouldn’t work without a photo. The other problem with a mass hexing is that it doesn’t solve the real issueFirst of all, if you’re going to hex Turner for being a rapist, you’re going to need to hex all of the rapists in this big, shitty world — and there are a lot of them.

Turner’s six-month sentence in a county jail is definitely too light, but he’s already in protective custody because sexual offenders are often targeted in prison and the notoriety of his case has apparently hit the jail TVs. He didn’t get what he deserves, but I’m not sure witchcraft is going to do the trick either. That being said, many on social media are all about this life. I mean, it can’t hurt, right?

Hexen didn’t hesitate to response to her haters, writing on Facebook:

However, better than gathering around and burning candles in the name of lifelong impotency for this newt would be actually doing something real. Like calling out victim shaming and blaming. Maybe not voting for that asshole judge. Voting for people who will do things to help victims and prevent rape to begin with. Spread the good word. TP his dad’s car (I’m joking).Already though the harassment is real. Turner’s friends are being harassed online, though in one case the mob mistook someone with the same name as someone who wrote an impact letter for Turner’s trial as the rapists’ friend and tweeted that they hoped if she had a daughter, she would be raped. This type of bullying is much more intense than casting spells, especially since it’s aimed at Turner’s friends and not Turner himself.

Look, I get the rage, but casting spells and threatening his defenders (disgusting though they may be) somehow validates them. Maybe that’s just because I’m a “come in peace” type person, but two wrongs don’t make a right. Sure, casting a spell and a little tweeting aren’t raping someone behind a dumpster, but there have got to be better ways to get justice.