This Study Found That Married People Are Less Likely To Become Alcoholics

Marriage can be a stressful venture. After all, it’s not easy to take two people with different life experiences, goals, and personalities and have them live in perfect harmony. People love to joke about how being married can drive you to drink, but a recent study by the American Journal of Psychiatry says marriage could actually prevent alcoholism. Take that, everyone-who-hates-on-their-friends-who-have-chosen-to-embrace-this-admittedly-antiquated-but-still-totally-right-for-a-lot-of-people-which-is-fine relationship institution!

A joint research project between Virginia Commonwealth University (VCU) and Lund University in Sweden found a correlation between marriage and a reduced risk of alcoholism. Kenneth Kendler, M.D., professor of psychiatry and human and molecular genetics at VCU, spoke to Medical Express in detail about what they were trying to accomplish with this project:

“With this study, we were trying to determine if marriage influences individuals’ future risks for alcohol use disorders. The answer is yes, and actually quite profoundly.”

The study, which is officially called “Effect of Marriage on Rink for Onset of Alcohol Use Disorder: A Longitudinal and Co-Relative Analysis in a Swedish National Sample,” examined the legal, pharmaceutical, and medical records of 3 million Swedish people. The findings were convincing – men and women in their first marriages had a 59% and 73%, respectively, lower risk of becoming alcoholics. The effects were even stronger for those who had a family history of alcohol abuse. The study followed people’s lives from their single days to married life and attributed the findings to “health-monitoring spousal interactions” and the “psychological and social aspects of marriage.” Ahhhh true love rocks.

Of course, the results can go way left field if a spouse already has issues with heavy drinking. The effects of cheating were also observed and showed that women were more likely to drink when faced with infidelity (because, sure, betrayal hurts).

A cheating husband escalated Annalise’s drinking. Well, that and murdering him.

On the surface, the study makes sense. A person with a generally supportive, loving spouse can turn to them for support during rough times and make them less likely to drink. The research seemed to leave out other important outside influences such as employment, race, and children. And, with only Swedish participants, it’s hard to gauge the relationship between marriage and alcohol in other parts of the world.

Speaking of things to make you drink in a marriage, here are a few more things they need to consider:

Socks On the Floor

Nothing…I repeat, NOTHING will make you want to grab a drink faster than funky socks lying on the floor beside the laundry basket.

Figuring Out What’s For Dinner

It’s the same thing every night: Your partner asks what you want for dinner, you say, “it doesn’t matter,” partner mentions a place, and you say you don’t want it. Pass your lover a drink while you make up your mind.

That Family Member

You know, bae’s kinfolks that you hate to see coming and are glad to see go…or maybe your own family? Where’s the vodka?

Snoring

Is there anything else to say? You know he (or she) can’t help it but SHUT THE HELL UP! Dammit.

*driiiink*