Beyoncé Plays “Purple Rain” And Other Highlights From The ‘Formation’ Tour Opener

Last night at Marlins Stadium in Miami, Beyoncé kicked off her Formation World Tour much to the excitement of literally every single person with a ticket for any date on this tour because finally, finally we get to see how Lemonade’s brilliance will translate to the big stage. And, according to the Beyhive, things went very, very well. The show, as per the AP, featured a mix of songs old and new, but with little mention of any of the specifics in Lemonade that have fueled the production of shitty t-shirts and amazing fan fiction.

Beyonce did not mention her husband — aside from a quick thank you at the end — and said little about her new album, noting only that her favorite song was “All Night,” a slow number that starts, “I’ve found the truth beneath your lies.” There was no mention of the presumed other woman, the much-discussed “Becky with the good hair.”

To watch Beyoncé the performer is like watching a highly intelligent and preternaturally perfect being flex in the height of their power. Below, a very compelling case for you to start saving your couch change and throwing it all at Stubhub when she comes to your area.

Here’s grainy VHS video (so retro!) of Beyonce covering “Purple Rain” during a costume change!!!

Remember “Mine,” from her last album? You know, the one with Drake? Of course you do, or maybe you don’t, because Lemonade is currently occupying every corner of the Beyonce space in your brain right now. Don’t worry; it’s a good song; it’s not the best, but maybe this choreography and the impassioned rap-screaming of thousands of geeked fans will change your mind.

Listen. If you paid all the money to sit way close to the stage and Beyonce reaches down and grabs your ass to come up on stage and do the Single Ladies dance which you last heard as you ran in horror off the dance floor at a wedding in 2013, I strongly suggest that you are ready to do that goddamn dance next to Beyonce.

I thought I hated “End of Time” and then I watched this 15 second clip of Beyonce stomping it out in the stage equivalent of one of those dirty puddles that collects in the crosswalk after it rains and I am a changed woman. I am changed.

https://twitter.com/TheBeyHiveTeam/status/725546986888290304

Sometimes she dances to songs that aren’t her own. This is one of those times.

https://twitter.com/TheBeyHiveTeam/status/725695041692299264

Here’s a full set list from last night’s show, if you hate/love/hate yourself. Here’s a question, Beyoncé: when will you perform “Schoolin’ Life?!” Please, it is an underrated gem.

Formation Sorry
Bow Down/Tom Ford
Run the World (Girls)
Mine
Baby Boy/Standing on the Sun
Hold Up
Countdown
Me, Myself and I
Runnin’
All Night
6 Inch
Don’t Hurt Yourself (plus some “Freakum Dress”)
Ring the Alarm
Lost Yo Mind/I Been On/Independent Woman/Naughty Girl
Diva
Flawless (Remix)
Feeling Myself
Yoncé
7/11
Drunk in Love (plus some “Swimming Pools”)
Partition
Rocket
Hip Hop Star
Daddy Lessons
Single Ladies
Purple Rain
Crazy in Love (2014 Remix, plus some “Bootylicious”)
Naughty Girl
Party
Blow
Sweet Dreams
Die With You
Freedom
Survivor
End of Time/Grown Woman (Mashup)
Halo

Whew. It’s like you were there, right? That’s what I thought. If you do happen go to, please make sure to snatch one of these “Boycott Beyoncé” shirts, send one to me and keep one for yourself. I’ll be at home deciding how much of my life I want to sell in order to see this show when it comes to New York.