Pair Of Penguins Expelled From Breeding Program Because They’re Gay

Stan and Olli are two male king penguins that were supposed to participate in a breeding program, but they were recently dismissed from said program because they are gay. Don’t worry, it’s actually quite a happy ending.

The Berlin Zoo’s European Conservation Programme (EEP) aims to bring more baby king penguins into the world and ensure the future of the species, according to the DailyMailIn a statement, Berlin Zoo spokeswoman Christiane Reiss insisted that Stan and Olli “[are] gay, as far as we know.”

“They never bred,” she went on. “And when it came to courtship, they only mated with one another.”

As a resolution, the couple has been transferred to Hamburg Zoo, where they will be in the company of exclusively males, including established couple Juan and Carlos. Yes, they have been transported to the Fire Island of zoos, free to be themselves and live happily ever after alongside another pair of gay penguins.

I sure hope this is the subject of Pixar’s next big budget film. The idea that animals, penguins specifically, can be gay has already inspired a popular children’s book, so a Pixar film isn’t actually too far off. And Tango Makes Threewhich was published in 2005, is about two male penguins from the Central Park Zoo that are given an egg to raise as their own. The book was based on a totally true story and received a lot of backlash, because garbage bigot never STFU.

I think the morale of the story here is that man, woman or penguin, nobody should be forced to have sex or breed with anybody they don’t want to.

[Daily Mail]