Whoopi Goldberg Wants To Make Menstrual Cramps Go Away With The Power of Weed

Menstrual cramps suck and they’re an unfortunate inevitability for the large swath of the population that experiences the joy of menstruation. But, Whoopi Goldberg(?) is here to save the day. She announced Wednesday that she’s teaming up with leading “canna-businesswoman” Maya Elisabeth to launch a medical marijuana company whose aim is to produce products specifically meant for alleviating the monthly hellfire that resides deep in your uterus.

The company, called Maya & Whoopi, will sell a variety of products including cannabis edibles, tinctures, topical rubs, and a THC-infused bath soak, which sounds like my idea of a good time, regardless of my moon cycle. Speaking to Vanity Fair, Goldberg said of the new products,

“For me, I feel like if you don’t want to get high high, this is a product specifically just to get rid of discomfort,” she says. “Smoking a joint is fine, but most people can’t smoke a joint and go to work.”

“This, you can put it in your purse,” Goldberg continues. “You can put the rub on your lower stomach and lower back at work, and then when you get home you can get in the tub for a soak or make tea, and it allows you to continue to work throughout the day.”

Yes! Yes. Cramps are a godawful side effect of the ~*joys of being a woman*~ and while there are other THC-based options out there for relieving menstrual cramps, the idea of something topical and edible that won’t fuck you up so much that you can’t do your job is appealing.

According to Goldberg, when she approached experts in the medical marijuana industry to ask about the desire for such a product, they told her that products like these are a little too “niche” – a patently ridiculous sentiment.

“Hey, this niche is half the population on the earth,” she says. “This seems to be people flippantly blowing you off, which is what you get whenever you start talking about cramps. They weren’t thinking how do you target this? I have grown granddaughters who have severe cramps, so I said this is what I want to work on.”

Thank you, Whoopi! Maya & Whoopi products will hit dispensaries in April and will sadly only be available in states where medical marijuana is legal.