This Thing Catches Beard Clippings But Lets Misogyny Slide Through

You might have seen this product on Shark Tank, that show where millionaires give start-up money to inventors, but the Beard King just came across my Twitter dashboard today. I’m simultaneously intrigued and horrified!

If you’ve ever lived with a beard, this seems like a reasonable solution, but like Carrie Bradshaw before me, I can’t help but wonder what’s up with all the sexism and misogyny in their ads.

https://twitter.com/beardking/status/711907819151294464

“Shave the Beaver, Not the Beard”? Really? Someone approved that, huh.

https://twitter.com/beardking/status/706889720559738881

Um, Mickey Mouse disapproves? But only the traditionally hot, half-naked girl version of Mickey Mouse.

Oh, cool, it gets grosser.

Here’s the thing: If you can’t maintain your beard without infusing your life with abject sexism, you should probably grow up, shave, and just be a whole entire person already.