Ben Affleck’s Back Tattoo Is Dead, Long Live Ben Affleck’s Back Tattoo

In sad news for Jennifer Garner, it turns out that Ben Affleck’s huge, stupid phoenix tattoo was just make-up. Affleck revealed that the art was “fake for a movie” to Mario Lopez on ExtraFake, overlarge, dumb, or not, it felt right for Ben, and I’m sad to see it it go.

Asked about the tat, Affleck gets a little stammery before immediately turning the tables on Lopez: “I have a fair number of tattoos… I try not to have them in places where you have to do a lot of cover-up. They get sort of addictive, tattoos, after a while. You have any?” (No, Ben, Mario Lopez would never violate his body like that, but thanks for asking.) Thanks also to Mario Lopez for spicing up a Monday morning with a lovely game: Does Ben Affleck have an inner thigh tat or what?

No word on when we’ll get to see this faux-sterpiece on the big screen, but it apparently also involves head wounds, bloody knuckles, and a sweet dressing gown.