Trump: No One Has Done As Much For Equality As I Have! I Own A Non-Segregated Resort!

Martin Luther King, Jr., Rosa Parks, Malcolm X, Harriet Tubman, Sojourner Truth. What do all these people have in common? The answer, if you happen to be Donald Trump, would be “None of them have done more for equality than Donald Trump has.”

Shocking, I know! Especially considering the fact that Trump has retweeted White Nationalists, has pretended to not know what the KKK is, has suggested that Mexican immigrants are all rapists and criminals, has suggested that nearly all Mexicans are rapists and murderers, and he repeatedly refers to different racial groups as “the hispanics” and “the blacks”–just like any non-racist person would do, and the fact that he still thinks that the Central Park Five, victims of one of the most notorious injustices in the history of our legal system–whom he took out full page ads to condemn during their trial, are guilty, despite the fact that Matias Reyes, the man who actually raped the Central Park Jogger has confessed and is in jail.

You would not think that a man that has said and done allllll of those things would have done more for equality than anyone. But he has. Modest freedom fighter that he is, he didn’t even mention this brave activism until this morning on Good Morning America, in which he was asked to renounce the support of the White Nationalists who love him and feel he speaks to their concerns.

Not only did Trump “disavow” David Duke, but he told ABC that “there is no one that has done so much for equality as I have.” No one, ok? Not one single person, in the history of ever.

Why? Because Donald Trump owns a very fancy resort called the Mar-a-lago in Palm Beach, Florida…that actually allows Jewish people and Black people in. I know, right? The man is an actual saint. Any Jewish person or Black person in the whole country is totally free to pay a $100,000 initiation fee and become a member of the Mar-a-lago, or to pay $1000 a night to stay in one of the club’s suites.

If that is not true equality, I don’t know what is! Just look at one of the opulent suites that an exorbitantly wealthy Black or Jewish person could possibly stay in! Just like a normal, exorbitantly wealthy white person!

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Now, this may not seem like a big deal to you, person whom it has never occurred to to own a club that would exclude people for being Black or Jewish in the first place–but because Mar-a-lago is a private club, Trump could totally ban Black and Jewish people if he wanted to. But he doesn’t! And he didn’t, even back in 1995–only five years after the PGA announced that they would not allow golf tournaments at segregated clubs! Talk about being on the front lines of the fight for equality.

Who knows what he will do next? Maybe he will say the Holocaust was a bad idea! Maybe he will drink from the same bubbler as Ben Carson! Surely, here, in the year 2016, there are ample opportunities for Trump to be not-quite-as-racist as a Jim Crow-era KKK member, and I am sure we will all be pleasantly surprised to see what he has in store.