Thank Us Later: Avocado Toast That Is Unconcerned With Being Healthy

I know, I know, avocado toast is two years done and everyone’s bored with it. I know. I’m just saying, maybe we should reconsider our fatigue with avocado toast, on this holiest of bread-related days, National Toast Day.

The greatest benefit of avocado toast isn’t the avocado. It’s that it doesn’t take a lot of skill to make, and it’s really, really filling. It started as a health trend, but I say we make it just a staple of our sandwich-related lives. Avocado toast is really just an open-faced sandwich with a lot of options for toppings. Who cares if it’s healthy?

And if none of that convinces you that we should #ReclaimAvocadoToast, hopefully I can convince you with this fantastic recipe that I concocted a few months ago when I had nothing but condiments and bacon in my fridge. I give you:


Avocado Toast, Unconcerned With Health


  • One slice of any kind of bread you want; my bet is that sourdough would taste the best
  • 1/4 avocado
  • 2-4 pieces of bacon, depending on how crazy you want to get, and I mean pork bacon
  • Mild giardiniera (or hot, go nuts)
  • Maybe like 4 kalamata olives
  • Salt & pepper


  1. Mash up your avocado and cut your olives into halves.
  2. Fry the bacon. Set aside and break it up into pieces once it cools down.
  3. Now, fry the toast in the bacon fat. (I told you this was fantastic.)
  4. Top the toast with the avocado, olives, and giardiniera, then stick in your bacon pieces.
  5. Eat it and don’t worry about thanking me. I already know.

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