Missing Cat Found Much Fatter, Happier In Gourmet Food Factory

When the two-year-old cat Clive disappeared from his owner’s home back in 2014, owners Tanya and Jonathan Irons immediately put up posters around the neighborhood, posted about it on Facebook and did everything in their power to find Clive. Eventually, they accepted the reality that they’d never see him again.

Little did they know Clive was not only surviving but thriving — feasting and fattening himself up at the pet food factory two miles away. The factory employees had noticed treats going missing for a while, but it wasn’t until last Wednesday that Clive was found living the life of a king twice his original size. That’s a fucking cat I can get behind.

“When we got him back we were shocked to see how big and fluffy he was. He’s obviously been living the life of Riley in that pet food factory,” Said Tanya, “He used to be very naughty and liked to go outside a lot. We thought somebody must have taken him in as he’s such a lovely cat.”

The couple has decided to tell their two year old daughter Elizabeth that Clive is new, because that’s a simpler story than explaining his fabulous runaway binge phase.