10 “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” Spoilers From The Hilarious Sara Benincasa

Happy “Star Wars” Day! Have you seen “The Force Awakens” yet? Did you wake up in the middle of the goddamn night like our own Rebecca, who went to bed at 8 p.m. and then got up for a 2 a.m. showing? I have the next few weeks off (more on that later, ahem), so my plan WAS to duck in for a matinee showing on Monday, and to go as far out of my way as possible to avoid spoilers until then – especially since there’s apparently some big OMG moments in the film that you really don’t want ruined. At a certain point, it’s not fair to expect the rest of the world to keep a lid on it, but I think it’s within reason for fans to request that they have at least 72 hours without spoilers being discussed openly. Unfortunately not everyone agrees. My friend Sara Benincasa seems to think the spoiler-free zone should last all of 72 minutes, because she was tweeting up a storm and spilling plenty of crazy details after seeing “The Force Awakens” last night. Goddamn her! And goddamn me for sharing them! Here are 10 things Sara says you can expect from the latest “Star Wars” film. And duh, SPOILER (j/k***) ALERT!!!

*** Obviously, these are not real spoilers, but they are fucking funny. For more fucking funny shit from Sara, follow her on Twitter.