Gwen Stefani Found Out About Gavin’s Nanny-Loving From Sexts On His iPad

Apparently Gwen Stefani figured out that Gavin Rossdale was cheating on her because of sexts she discovered on an iPad which was linked to his phone, most likely due to the dastardly, villainous influence of The Cloud.

Beware the Cloud. Remember, remember, the 13th of November and also The Cloud, which is watching you, always, sleeping on its feet with its eyes open like a horse. The Cloud knows. [E! News]

Justin Timberlake’s baby boy Silas will maybe not be vaccinated because Jessica Biel is afraid that vaccinations “causes complications.”  Hey, Biel? You know what’s complicated? Measles, mumps, rubella, whooping cough and having to homeschool your spawn because he can’t go anywhere because he’s not vaccinated.  Please. Thank you. Good day. [InTouch]

Happy Belieber Day, remember Justin Bieber’s monkey? Not the one that lives in the depths of his drop crotch pants, but the monkey that he had as a pet for a while? Yeah, that guy. He wants another one: “I don’t see anything wrong with having a monkey. I might get another one.” Don’t get a monkey, Bieber, I’m almost on board with you. A monkey is not the answer. [iD]

Reese Witherspoon sat in a car with Derek Blasberg and talked about how Southern she is, which is endearing if you like Reese Witherspoon and irritating if you do not. [Vanity Fair]

That girl on the left standing next to Joey Tribbiani isn’tJennifer Aniston. WHERE IS JENNIFER ANISTON?!?! AHAHDKHFSDKJF*.  [Cosmopolitan]

AHH FRIENDS OMFG A MISTAKE OMFGGGG NOOO

Via some miracle, Teresa Giudice and her husband Joe won’t lose their giant palace of bricks and bad taste. Their house is no longer in foreclosure, somehow. Tre’s coming home on December 23rd, just in time for Christmas and pasta and sad sex with Juicy Joe before it’s his turn in jail. [Radar]

Heres a picture of Katy Perry looking like a goth First Lady, butting into what was probably a very nice date between FKA Twigs and Robert Pattinson. [People]

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*I do not enjoy the television show “Friends.”