RIP #Squad: Ryan Seacrest To Produce Sitcom, “Squad Goals”

It’s official: your squad, regardless of its members, is no longer cool. Variety reports that Ryan Seacrest will be executive producer of a scripted sitcom. It’s called “Squad Goals,” which is a terrible name for anything, especially a scripted television sitcom on CB-fucking-S, about a “group of late 20-something friends who met in college and realize it’s time to finally grow up.” Oh, god. Does this mean Taylor Swift’s won?

According to Variety:

Insiders say the comedy, loosely inspired by the writers’ own observations, came to fruition when the pair realized they, among many other young adults, were at a pivotal life moment when their friends were at a crossroads, either balancing marriage and mortgages — or margaritas.

It appears Ryan Seacrest and the writers of this no-good-very-bad-idea realized that life comes at you fast and decided to package a television show around what is essentially a fact of life and nothing more. That’s one way to make money, but it’s also a fast way to encourage your target audience to throw their television sets in the trash and set them on fire. You know what they say — once network television seizes upon a cultural phenomenon and repackages it to appeal to a demographic that has already moved on, it’s dead. Pour one out for #squadgoals everywhere.