7 Weed-Friendly Things McDonald’s Already Has Going For Itself

When Now8News reported that several Colorado McDonald’s franchises were adding marijuana smoking pods, it was right around the time the fast food giant also started serving all day breakfast, so it seemed to check out. But in another case of mistaken satire, several sources picked up the story before realizing it was a joke. But really, the joke is on McDonald’s restaurants across the country, because they’ve been pretty pot-friendly for a long time.

Sure, you can’t vape smoke inside, but there are plenty of other perks to satisfy your weedy ways.

1. All Day Breakfast: In September, McDonald’s announced that they would start serving breakfast all day on October 6th. Now that this glorious day has come, you can feel like your wake ‘n’ baking after a long day of work instead of first thing in the morning. Not only is this more responsible, it’s also a hangover-free happy hour.

2. Drive-Thrus: A lot of stoners already treat their cars like weed-filled pods, and Mickey D’s drive-thrus make satisfying the munchies even easier.

3. Soft-Serve: One of the dangers of smoking weed is that you might develop serious cotton mouth during your pursuit of munchies. Soft-serve is always the answer for quenching that thirst and hunger at the same time. It’s also very fun to eat.

4. Mini Apple Pies: It’s like McDonald’s knew you couldn’t be trusted with an entire pie when that stoned hunger hits! These heavenly pockets of apple filling will satisfy your cravings and make you feel like a giant while holding them. As if there’s anything else you wanted.

5. Play Place: Hanging out with kids you don’t know while high isn’t good for either of you. That said, if you encounter a kid-less Play Place during off-peak hours, then it can be the best thing that ever happened to you and your bag of weed. Just make sure both of you make it out of there before any kids show up.

6. Happy Meals: While some restaurants can be very strict about kid’s meal deals, McDonald’s thinks Happy Meals are for everyone. That’s some real dank customer service.

7. Nonjudgmental Staff: You don’t have to be a fan of McDonald’s while sober to appreciate the fact that their staff likely won’t judge you when you’re not. It’s a lot like the Olive Garden when you think about it — when you’re there, you’re fucked up enough to think you’re family.