Farrah Abraham Hopes You’ll Take A Sexy Selfie With Her Inflatable Sex Doll

So far, in 2015, more people have died from unfortunate selfie accidents than have died from shark attacks. I don’t personally find that surprising given that more people die of “literally anything else” than they do from shark attacks. Yet it is with that news in mind that I bring you the news (?) that Farrah Abraham is once again selling sex toys of herself.

Abraham — who starred in both MTV’s “Teen Mom” and Vivid Video’s “Backdoor Teen Mom” (with Frisky columnist James Deen), and who writes books on Christian parenting and stars in terrible music videos I forgot about until a minute ago, and who apparently at one point opened or was going to open a FroYo shop — can now be the star of your sexy bedroom fantasy/dystopian nightmare as well! Because now she isn’t just a disembodied pussy and ass, she’s also a blowup doll (with a pussy and ass). And she would like you to purchase that doll, and take a “sexy selfie” with it. As one does.

If someone was going to buy just one toy from the collection, what should it be?

Definitely the Farrah Abraham inflatable doll with cyberskin pussy and ass. Who wouldn’t want to take me everywhere with them? Let’s take a sexy selfie together or make a video of our own! The best part about it is that the tight “love tunnel” holes are tight and texturized for ultimate pleasure!

OK. Fine. Whatever. I am not here to judge what people like to do sexually. I am, however, here for judging the creepiness of dolls, and that thing is fucking terrifying.

I mean.

farrah abraham sex doll

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

To be fair to Farrah, I don’t think there is any way a blowup doll with someone’s actual face painted on it could not be terrifying. But if I were her, I would probably not want people to tag me in any “sexy selfies” they took with this doll. Also I feel like I would have insisted upon having hands. I didn’t know blowup dolls didn’t have hands! I mean, I guess they don’t need them, but still.

Anyway, if you would like to purchase a Farrah blowup doll, for reasons, or would like to purchase a reconstruction of Farrah’s disembodied ass and vagina, head on over to “Simply Pleasures” and browse the collection. I’m sure there’s something for everyone!

[The Superficial]