Marco Rubio Shares His Bizarre Planned Parenthood Conspiracy Theory

GOP Presidential candidate Marco Rubio stopped by an Iowa news station on Monday in order to have a chat about Planned Parenthood, and his reasons for wanting to defund it. Alas, exactly none of those reasons were in any way based in fact! Because for some reason, Rubio and his buddies insist on continuing to believe those bullshit Planned Parenthood videos even though they’ve been factually debunked at least a thousand times. They still continue to believe that there is some kind of money to be made in donating fetal tissue and organs, which, for the love of god, there is not.

Rubio insists that, in addition to faking the moon landing and framing Lee Harvey Oswald, Planned Parenthood “pushes” abortion on women in order to get that sweet sweet money from fetal tissue and organ donations. Which is a completely insane conspiracy theory when you think about it. If that is their scheme, they are terrible business people, because the money they “get” for those donations literally only covers the cost of donating them. It would be like if Amazon only charged people shipping and handling fees — not much of a profit to be made there!

To be honest, if they really wanted to rake in the cash, they’d make a lot more from women actually going through with a pregnancy than they would from an abortion.

When questioned about his theory that Planned Parenthood “pushes” abortion on women, Rubio doubles down, saying that women come in and that is the only option they’re offered and no one even discusses adoption with them.

Listening to this, one would think that Marco Rubio had never interacted with a woman in his entire goddamned life. Because here is one thing I can tell you — literally every one of us has at the very least a pretty solid idea, at this moment, of what we would do if we were suddenly pregnant. If we would have an abortion, if we would have the baby and give it up for adoption, or if we’d keep it. Does he really think we don’t think about this, that we haven’t thought about this very thoroughly pretty much our entire lives? Since we first even thought about having sex?

Does he think we’re stupid?

I can tell you right now, Marco Rubio, that if I woke up this morning and were pregnant, the very first thing I would do would be to march my ass down to Planned Parenthood and RU-486 that shit. I would have exactly no need to discuss adoption with anyone, because I do not want to carry a baby to term, in my body. If someone were to try and discuss adoption with me, I would probably want to punch them in the face.

I can also tell you that there are women out there who would not ever consider that option. It’s pretty unlikely that those women are going down to Planned Parenthood to “discuss their options,” and that the only option given to them would be abortion. Pretty sure you don’t get offered an abortion as your “only option” unless you say “I want an abortion.”

That’s not how that works! That’s not how any of that works!

If you’re going to oppose abortion–fine. If you’re going to oppose Planned Parenthood–fine. But at least have the decency to oppose them on the grounds of things that are not just lies, pipe dreams and conspiracy theories.