Hey, Spotify, Ginuwine’s “Pony” Is Not An Appropriate Song For Your ‘Netflix And Chill” Playlist

Lots of Spotify users are taking the concept of “Netflix and chill” into their own hands, giving it life past Twitter memes and Tinder sexts and making their own boner jam playlists. Spotify, being the all-seeing eye of Sauron that it is, made their own Netflix and Chill playlist. It’s decent, but there’s one crucial error: it leads with Ginuwine’s “Pony” which is decidedly not a song you want to make out to.

“Pony” is the song that Channing Tatum air-humps to in both “Magic Mike” and “Magic Mike XXL.” It’s a song that you body roll to while browsing cereal at the grocery store. It’s a song that leads up to the act of Netflix and chill, but not what you listen to once you’ve actually settled in. I refuse to believe that when you’re about to make out with a stranger, “Pony” inspires you to turn off the lights and go for it.

There are some other missteps on their list. Elle Goulding’s “Love Me Like You Do” is an uptempo banger that would make anyone trapped under the loving embrace of a stranger with their pants off scramble to press skip. The inclusion of R. Kelly’s “Ignition (Remix)” feels like a strange choice as well. This is a song that everyone still sings along to, even though R. Kelly is a terrible man who peed on a 14-year-old girl on video.

The list almost redeems itself with the addition of H-Town’s “Knockin’ The Boots,” a certified sex banger that combines classic ’90s R&B runs with a slowed-down, smoothed out beat. You could effectively knock the boots to this song. It’d be funny and fun and a little bit sleazy, which is what all good sex is. But Spotify really screws the pooch just one song later with the addition of Kanye’s remix of Chief Keef’s Chicago “Don’t Like.” Why, oh why, would you want to make out to this hard ass drill anthem? Why? How?

Spotify, if you’re open to suggestions, please consider switching out “Pony” for the far-sexier, much-smoother “So Anxious.” You’re welcome, young lovers. Get to boning. [The Daily Dot]