Study: Voicemail Less Sexy Than Email, Everything Else On The Planet

Today in duh: A recent study published in the journal Computers in Human Behaviour says that people are more likely to be aroused from a sexy email than they are from a sexy voicemail. This contradicts a previous theory called “media naturalness,” which holds that that communication is less effective the further you get from face-to-face contact, but is perfectly in line with my personal theory that voicemail is the actual worst thing ever.

Via The Star:

To understand how we respond emotionally to different forms of communication, Dennis and his colleague Taylor Wells, an assistant professor of management information systems at California State University-Sacramento, worked with 72 university-age participants.

Strong, thoughtful language that is more often a product of e-mail and not voicemail arouses the emotions better than voicemail, they concluded.

“When writing romantic e-mails, senders consciously or subconsciously added more positive content to their messages, perhaps to compensate for the medium’s inability to convey vocal tone,” wrote the researchers.

Sure, it could be that. Or it could be the fact that voicemail is annoying as hell, and probably no one wants to be seduced in between messages from their student loan officer and their grandmother. Seriously. What kind of MONSTER would leave a sexy voicemail? I honestly cannot imagine a scenario in which that would happen — although, frankly, it couldn’t happen, because my voicemail box has been full for 10 years now. Best way to keep people from leaving you voicemails is to keep your inbox full, #LIFEHACK.

To be fair, I don’t think I’d really want a sexy email either. I don’t really use email for social purposes, in general, and tend to stick to Facebook, Twitter, texting and GChat for all of that, as I think most people do. I think my dad might be the only person who sends me non-work related emails. Maybe I’m unpopular! Who knows!

Anyway, in conclusion, I do not want any sexy voicemails, and I don’t think anyone else does either.

[The Star]