Great, Even Light Drinking Gives You Cancer
A new report in the British Medical Journal used two American studies of over 100,000 adults to look at alcohol and cancer risk, and they found out that even light drinking – one drink a day – can increase your risk of developing cancer, especially breast cancer. As is usually the case with health advisories, some health officials connected to the study are saying that abstaining from alcohol altogether would be your best bet, and some are saying that as long as you drink moderately, your risk should be low. Oh, medical researchers. You make health advice so clear and easy for the public to understand.
Just so we’re clear, these are all things that increase your risk of developing cancer:
- Existing on the Earth as time progresses (aging)
- Going outside (sun exposure)
- Not eating the right things, although that’s always sort of nebulous
- Not exercising
- Being overweight
- Stomach ulcers caused by Helicobacter bacteria, which is spread through water
- Human Papillomavirus, which basically everyone has
- The Epstein-Barr virus, which also causes mono, so watch your kissin’
- Pollution in your air and water that you’re probably not even aware of
- Some chemicals that are commonly used in makeup
Basically, you’re not going to not get cancer. That’s where we’re at, as a species. Humans and human ancestors have apparently been drinking booze for 10 million years. I say drink up. Prost!
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