Sarah Palin Quits The Internet Teevee Game

It is with a heavy heart that I bring you the news that your subscriptions to the Sarah Palin Channel are about to expire … forever. For in the grand tradition of Sarah Palin quitting everything she ever started, she has now decided to give up on the dream of charging people money to watch her, um, do whatever it is that she does on that channel.

However, don’t break out the Kleenex just yet! Although she is canceling her subscriber service, she will now be offering you free content on her Facebook page and on the SarahPAC website. Just like you always dreamed.

BEHOLD, her farewell address:

Hey, I wanna thank you from the bottom of my heart for your support, and to let you know personally that we’re making all of my content free now! It’s starting August 1st, everything’s free, and just to let you know, that it is an honor to have you subscribe, really it’s been so illuminating and still is so illuminating to read and to respond to many of your insightful comments about current events, about so many things goin’ on in our world today.

Now, it is with an important presidential election comin’ up that we are gonna do this. I just want to make sure that your voices and mine are heard by the widest possible audience across this great land of ours. I really look forward to continuing to hear your ideas and your dreams and your solutions for America. I’m going to share my own too, keep doin’ this on Facebook and, and on the road as we confront these critical choices that we have in 2016.

Members can find additional information about their subscriptions by clicking on the link below this video. Just know that it means so much that we’re taking this journey together. So, keep the conversation going, let’s keep at it, keep the faith, and I thank you.

And here is the video, via Wonkette:

Personally, I was a little disappointed that the Sarah Palin Channel never offered any sitcom-like fare. I mean, I think it could have worked for them. Think about it! Shows like “All In The Family, Except Archie Bunker Is A Good Guy And No One Thinks He Is A Jerk Ever,” “The Phyllis Schlafly Variety Hour,” “The Sarah Palin Chronicles”–in which Sarah goes back in time to stop the Labor Movement and the New Deal and such. Really, I think they missed an opportunity here.

Who knows though–this could always be a sign that Sarah intends to run for President, so I’m sure we’ll all get some good free laffs if that happens.