Today Was National Lobster Day?! Here’s How To Boil A Live One!

Well, this just isn’t right! Today was NATIONAL LOBSTER DAY and no one told me. Which is sad, because lobster is legitimately my favorite food on the planet. I realize this makes it sound like I’m way fancy, but I grew up in New England so the price points on lobster were not always super crazy, especially when we got them from the docks.

Also sad is the fact that I just recently found out that Gérard de Nerval did not actually have a pet lobster named Thibault that he walked around town on a blue silk ribbon. I mean, I should have figured this out, knowing that lobsters can’t exactly hang out on dry land for extended periods of time–but it was just the best mental picture on earth.

Anyway! I love lobster everything–lobster rolls, lobster mac and cheese, lobster chowder, lobster bisque. Basically every time my family and I go back to Rhode Island I eat all the lobster like I’m a bear that will soon have to go into lobster hibernation. While I finally found a place in Chicago that has really good lobster rolls, my first experience with one here was dreadful. Like, they put potatoes in it-dreadful, so I approach with caution.

However, no matter where you live, I think, you can still boil your own live lobster. Sure, it seems like it’s super complicated, but it’s not, so it’s a great way to impress people without too much effort.

Here’s the quick and dirty on what to do, hopefully without having an Annie Hall moment. I don’t do measurements, FYI.

Get your live lobsters, obviously. Once you’re home, fill a large pot about 3/4 of water, toss some salt in, and wait for it to come to a boil. Then, drop your lobsters into the bowl while squealing loudly (some people cut the bands off beforehand, but I am terrified of being murdered by a lobster claw so I don’t recommend it), and boil them until they turn bright red.

There! You’ve boiled some lobsters! Congratulations!

After you’ve let them cool, cut the bands off, and split the lobster on the bottom down the middle and just pull out the meat from the tail and wash that off.

If you just want to eat lobster, you’re done there. You can eat it with butter or cut it up with some mayo and celery and have some lobster salad.

But, if you want to get fancy about it, you take all the gross stuff out from the sternum area and throw that away. Then, you cut up the meat a little, and stuff that back into the sternum and tail.

Some people like to get fancy with their stuffing, and put crab meat in it. Personally? I like to keep it simple. Just crush up some Ritz crackers with melted butter and some parsley, put it on top of the lobster meat, and stick it in the oven on like, 450 or something for about 10 minutes until the stuffing is crispy. Take them out of the oven and serve with melted butter. TA, frickin’ DA.

You’re welcome. Oh! And don’t forget to crack the claws and take the meat out of there too for simple butter dipping purposes whilst eating.