American Apparel To Finally Sell Clothes Instead Of Vaginas

American Apparel, your one-stop shop for mesh bralettes and pants marketed to adult women but sized for children, is having an image crisis. Disgraced CEO Dov Charney is a proven lech and stock prices have plummeted. Now, Bloomberg reports that the beleaguered company is undergoing a makeover to prove that they’re more than just vaginas on billboards and mannequins with visible pubic hair.

In a slideshow titled “Chaotic to Iconic” presented to investors on Monday, the brand promises to transform its image from lewd to less lewd, focusing instead on the clothing instead of the errant nipples and genitalia of the models. Progress? Sure.


American Apparel is far too expensive for my taste, and their clothing sizes seem categorically designed to make just about everybody feel like shit about their body. I don’t know if this is a Dov Charney trademark, or if this is just how it goes, there, but I like their things, and would love to throw my hard-earned money into their coffers in exchange for a tent dress or two. Change is a good thing, so hopefully this will work out for them, too. Maybe. I doubt it.