Look At This Douchebag (In Training): The Anonymous Author Of Steps To Becoming A Douchebag

A kindly tipster sent Jezebel a terrifying artifact of teenage boyhood at its worst: A manual entitled Steps To Becoming A Douchebag, which lays out in clear, plain English how to go from being a regular boy to a reprehensible slimeball junior pickup artist (PUA). According to the tipster, a junior lacrosse player from a high school in Connecticut wrote the manual and then distributed it amongst his peers, so they could all learn from the wisdom he surely gleaned from whatever dark hole of pop culture he inhabited.

It’s a real doozy. The author of the manual apparently achieved much fame and glory amongst his peers. The whole thing warrants a read, and Jezebel has it in its entirety, but the absolute worst part is excerpted for you below. After a breakdown of the different kinds of girls to pick up and the methods that work the “best,” the author presents his readers with a few valuable tips. You know, the kind of info that’s just nice to have in your back pocket:

Extra Info

  • Girls are not that hard to manipulate and it only gets easier the more you do it
  • The more girls you talk to the higher the chance of getting a hook up is so quantity is more important than quality
  • Girls are going to want a guy who’s talked about so even a bad hook up is better than none at all
  • Don’t be afraid to get shut down, you’ll never land a girl if you never make the effort

Yikes. The whole thing is horrifying. Read it here. Happy Tuesday! [Jezebel]