Duck Dynasty Dude Shares Beautiful Dream Of Atheist Family Being Raped And Beheaded

This Friday, some wacko site called TruNews (sounds legit) aired a speech given by “Duck Dynasty” patriarch Phil Robertson at the Vero Beach Prayer Breakfast earlier that day. The site described it as “powerful”; I, however, and probably you, would describe it as “fucking batshit.” At least the part of it where he makes a point about the value of being religious by describing the gruesome rape, decapitation and castration of an atheist family.

Via RightWingWatch:

“I’ll make a bet with you,” Robertson said. “Two guys break into an atheist’s home. He has a little atheist wife and two little atheist daughters. Two guys break into his home and tie him up in a chair and gag him. And then they take his two daughters in front of him and rape both of them and then shoot them and they take his wife and then decapitate her head off in front of him. And then they can look at him and say, ‘Isn’t it great that I don’t have to worry about being judged? Isn’t it great that there’s nothing wrong with this? There’s no right or wrong, now is it dude?’”

Robertson kept going: “Then you take a sharp knife and take his manhood and hold it in front of him and say, ‘Wouldn’t it be something if this [sic] was something wrong with this? But you’re the one who says there is no God, there’s no right, there’s no wrong, so we’re just having fun. We’re sick in the head, have a nice day.’”

“If it happened to them,” Robertson continued, “they probably would say, ‘something about this just ain’t right.”

What? What kind of person goes around making bets like that? Who on earth fantasizes about other people getting hurt for the purposes of learning the harsh lesson about how you are right about stuff? Shit. That is a horrible thing to even think about.

I’ll tell you what’s not right, Phil Robertson. What’s not right is the fact that, apparently, the only thing keeping you from going full Albert Fish is your fear of being judged by god after you are dead. I mean, I gotta say– I know a decent amount of people who believe in God and I am quite sure that none of them are one crisis in faith away from becoming homicidal maniacs. At least I hope.

Truthfully though, if believing in god is what is keeping Phil Robertson from raping, decapitating and castrating entire families, then he should definitely keep doing that. Whatever helps you, Phil! But I kind of think that people who are inclined to do that sort of thing will end up doing it whether they believe in god or not. Because they’re psychotic. In fact, they may even think it is “god’s plan” for them.

I, however, have managed to be a pretty nice and non-homicidal person my whole life without believing in god. So have most other atheists! I don’t actually need the fear of some kind of punishment in the afterlife to be a decent human being who does not murder people.