Taylor Swift Just Bought A Bunch Of Porn Sites To Preemptively Save Her Reputation

Taylor Swift, cat mom and universal best friend to all that are lithe and flowy of hair, has just purchased some domain names to ensure that her goody-goody reputation remains that way — forever. Starting June 1, hundreds of new domain names will be made available, including .adult, .porn and .sucks, so any enterprising amateur pornographer could’ve found a girl with bangs and a pissy expression, filmed some hardcore sex and put ‘em up on TaylorSwift.porn.

Sadly, this will never happen, because the actual Taylor Swift has added a slew of domains to her ever-growing portfolio of potentially offensive and slandering websites that she never wants to see the light of day. While I begrudgingly admire her tireless protection of her personal #brand, there’s a whiff of tinfoil hat paranoia about this whole thing that makes me wonder just how much of a Madewell-pixie-dream-girl she really is. [E!]