Pat Robertson: Satanic Covens Use Facebook To Curse Unborn Children

Pat Robertson, who is still somehow not dead yet, fielded a question on Tuesday morning from a viewer concerned over her daughter’s predilection for posting her ultrasound pictures on Facebook.

Cynthia writes:

My daughter is pregnant with her first child (my first grandchild) and obviously there is a lot of rejoicing and excitement. Young parents now regularly post fetal ultrasound photos as their Facebook photo. From a spiritual point of view is there any harm in doing this? Please give me your thoughts on this?

Is there? Is there really, Pat Robertson? Of course there is. Because Satan is real into social media.

“I don’t think there is any harm in it. But I tell you, there are demons and there are evil people in the world, and you post a picture like that and some cultist gets hold of it or a coven and they begin muttering curses against an unborn child. You never know what somebody’s going to do.”

YOU NEVER KNOW. Satanic covens could just be going through all of the Facebook looking for unborn babies to curse. For fun!

Hm. I’ve gotta say–if I legitimately believed in the kinds of evil Satanic covens that Pat Robertson believes in, I feel like I’d hope they’d do more interesting shit than just go through Facebook putting the malook on some ultrasound pictures. That wouldn’t even make for a decent episode of “Buffy.” Who would even be in charge of such tedious work, and what are they getting out of it? Do Satanic covens have interns?

I mean, if I were in a Satanic cult and I got stuck on Facebook ultrasound cursing duty, I’d be a little miffed. I would want something more glamorous. Like convincing Mia Farrow to drink tannis root smoothies and sneaking all our secret images and symbols into music videos. “Hecubus,” I would say, “I did not get into devil-worship to do this kind of grunt work. Don’t we have minions for this? What’s a lady gotta do to get a decent minion around here? I am not here for this, Hecubus.”

[Right Wing Watch]