This Bigfoot Hunter Has A Swell Investment Opportunity For Some Sucker Out There

I do not personally believe in Bigfoot, but there are a lot of people who do. Why? I’m not sure. You’d think that it would occur to these people that if Bigfoot did exist that we would have found one by now, or at least the rotting carcass of one. I mean, unless they think that these creatures have a magical ability to disappear upon death or something.

Anyway, some people are so into the idea of sasquatches secretly existing that they basically spend all their spare time trying to find one. Carmine “Tom” Biscardi is one of those people–and he needs your help. $3 million dollars worth of help, in fact.

Via Wall Street Journal:

Mr. Biscardi and his partners hope to raise as much as $3 million by selling stock in Bigfoot Project Investments. They plan to spend the money making movies and selling DVDs, but are also budgeting $113,805 a year for expeditions to find the beast. Among the company’s goals, according to its filings with the Securities and Exchange Commission: “capture the creature known as Bigfoot.”

Yes. I’m sure they’ll sell a lot of movies. Movies of people schlepping around a forest not finding Bigfoot. Sounds like some real quality entertainment to me!

I have to wonder–if, by some magical miracle this dude actually found Bigfoot, what would the follow-up plan be? Like what is it these people want to do once they’ve found Bigfoot? I mean, you could re-enact some scenes from “Harry and The Hendersons,” I suppose, but where does one go from there? Are they going to put it in a zoo? What?

Apparently, Biscardi is well-known but not especially well liked in the Bigfoot hunting community, and the reason why is completely hilarious.

Mr. Biscardi, who has trumpeted a number of Bigfoot sightings and captures that didn’t pan out, is a controversial figure among Bigfoot enthusiasts. In 2008, he held a news conference in Palo Alto, Calif., to detail his examination of what he said was the carcass of a male Bigfoot that checked in at 7 feet 7 inches tall and weighed more than 500 pounds. The Bigfoot, found by two men in Georgia, turned out to be a rubber gorilla costume stuffed with animal parts and outfitted with a set of teeth that may have been bovine in origin.

Asked about the incident, Mr. Biscardi said he had been deceived. But that hasn’t quieted skeptics in the community like Kathy Strain, who said she is astonished the Georgia debacle didn’t put an end to Mr. Biscardi’s pursuit of Bigfoot.

“It just makes it a big joke,” she said.

Yes, it is unfortunate that hoaxes like this make the pursuit of an imaginary creature seem like a big joke.

But hey! It’s your money! You go and invest it in this dude’s quest if you like. And right after you do, I would very much like to talk to you about some land in Florida I’ve been looking to sell. [Wall Street Journal]