Watch This Tortoise’s Futile Attempts At Fornicating With A Croc

Today in extremely old video gems from the depths of YouTube, I bring you the sad story of Toby the Tortoise who spends a solid minute or so puttin’ in work with a discarded Croc on someone’s lawn. The tiny squeaks! His insistent, determined thrusts! The Croc’s complacency! This is what it’s like when you end up on the receiving end of some assbag you met on Tinder, and really, really just want to go to sleep, but might as well go with it, because hey, he’s cute, and it’s been a minute. I feel for that utility clog. Enjoy!