50 Things About Summer That Actually Suck

We hate to be the ones to say it, but someone has to — sometimes summer can actually suck. Sure, it’s the picture of bliss during those first few weeks of June when you’re wearing a new sundress and the weather is perfect. But that novelty wears off around the sixth week of being perpetually sweaty, stubbly, mosquito-bitten and sunburnt. And you can only put off those invitations to go camping with your brother-in-law so many times. What part of “I’m not an outdoorsy person” does he not understand?!

After the jump, here’s 50 things about summer that actually suck.  Is it September yet?

  1. Boob sweat
  2. Ass sweat
  3. Sunscreen in your eyes
  4. Bug spray in your eyes
  5. Waves ripping your bikini top off
  6. Shaving your legs
  7. Shaving your pubes
  8. Nicking your legs and/or pubes
  9. Not giving a shit anymore about shaving your legs and/or pubes and then feeling self-conscious
  10. Higher electricity bills thanks to running the air conditioner all day
  11. When everyone else gets summer Fridays and you don’t
  12. Mosquito bites
  13. Wearing sandals and people stepping on your toes
  14. Honeybees
  15. Bumble bees
  17. Sand in your cooch
  18. Weirdly shaped sunburn
  19. Old men ogling you
  20. Young men ogling you
  21. Street harassment, period
  22. Melted ice cream droplets
  23. Melted popsicles
  24. Watermelon drips
  25. Chipped pedicures
  26. Hot subway platforms
  27. Ticks
  28. That terrible white shorts/early period incident
  29. Having to work when it’s clearly a beach day
  30. A Frappuccino costs HOW much?!
  31. Burnt hot dogs
  32. Burnt burgers
  33. Getting caught in a freak thunderstorm
  34. Those chuckleheads who set off fireworks for an entire week before the Fourth of July
  35. Showing up to a picnic that only has three different kinds of potato salad
  36. That hot young intern that you’re not even legally allowed to look at
  37. Sun poisoning
  38. Guilt trips to buy 50-cent cups of lemonade from the lemonade stand
  39. Weak fans
  40. When a cheap pair of flip flops breaks
  41. Why does a lobster roll need to cost $16?
  42. That cold you get from transitioning between 90 degrees outside and 65 degrees in air conditioning
  43. Hotboxing your BO in a maxi dress
  44. Children are out of school and running around like terrors everywhere
  45. That date in mid-July when you are going to rip all of your hair out if you have to hear the “song of summer” one more time
  46. Weird marks on your skin from laying in a hammock
  47. Ants
  48. A staycation when what you really want is a vacation
  49. Why does iced coffee cost more than regular coffee?
  50. Someone always wants to play frisbee

[Image of an ice cream cone via Shutterstock]