We Should Obviously All Go See This Documentary About A Penis Museum Called “The Final Member”

Who needs Iceland’s beautiful scenery and hot springs when you can visit The Icelandic Phallological Museum instead? The Reykjavik museum is the world’s most diverse (and only?) penis museum, housing specimens from every mammal in the country.

The museum is owned by former teacher Sigurður “Siggi” Hjartarson, whose collection began when he acquired a bull’s member in 1974 and started to receive other penis specimens as gag gifts. As his collection grew, he became more intentional about adding to it. Not surprisingly, his family eventually grew fed up with how much space all the dicks were taking up in his home, so he moved them into a museum which he opened in 1997.

Hjartarson’s quest for a penis that would complete his collection — one of the human variety — inspired a documentary called “The Final Member,” releasing on April 18. Apparently, being the first guy to donate his junk for preservation in the museum is quite the aspiration. The competition was fierce – the movie follows a middle-aged American man and an elderly Icelandic man who are each hoping their peen comes out on top. Our American contender, who lovingly refers to his dick as “Elmo,” insists that when people visit the museum “I’d like them to know that the largest and best [penis] came from the States.” Such commitment to patriotism!

Hjartarson doesn’t so much agree with the documentary’s framing of the situation. To him, the human dong is no more special than any other in his collection. “I wasn’t altogether too happy about it but that’s a different matter,” he told TIME. “This is their film and I’m not intervening in any way. I was getting so tired of it in the end because they were always asking only about the human [specimen]…it’s just one of 96 different species I’ve got.”

Hjartarson wants people to know that his museum is about science, not sexing. “I loathe pornography,” he told TIME.” I hope people realize this is not a joke.” All I know is that I wish I had as much passion for anything as Hjartarson has for his dick collection – and that I am strangely riveted by which man ended up getting to be the first donor.

[The Final Member]