10 Ways Dyeing Your Hair For The First Time Is Like Losing Your Virginity
Believe it or not, saying goodbye your virgin hair is a lot like losing your actual virginity. Whether you’re getting highlights, lowlights, or a full-head dye job, altering your natural hair color for the first time, especially as a full-grown adult, can be pretty terrifying … but also exciting!
I recently decided to undergo a hair transformation myself, and while it wasn’t super drastic, it was enough of a change that I still felt all the feelings. Dirty blonde up until this time last week, I decided I wanted to lighten my locks with a full head of highlights and go blonder for the first time ever. So I did. And now I’m MUCH blonder. Believe it or not, I found that parting ways with my former hair was a lot like having sex for the first time all over again. Let me explain…
1. It’s Equal Parts Awesome And Petrifying: You decide you’re going to do it, and all of a sudden you’re not sure if you’re going to throw up from fear or excitement. Once it finally happens, you’re still not sure if you’re going to throw up from fear or excitement. This eventually subsides.
2. You Have Regrets: Immediately after you do the deed, you contemplate why on earth you went through with it. Now you can never take it back. Your virgin status is gone, and it’s not comin’ back.
3. You May Cry: Depending on how extreme your change is, there’s a possibility there might be waterworks, sometimes even during the act. It’s always good to keep tissues nearby … heh.
4. You Stare At Yourself In The Mirror Trying To Decide If You Feel Different: This may last for hours or it may last for weeks. I’ve had blonder hair and a new cut for a week now, and I still don’t know how I feel about it. I feel like this is where some sort of support group could be of assistance.
5. You Need To See Yourself Naked: Now that your cherry is popped, you MUST know what you look like in the buff. After all, you want to know exactly what it is your partner is seeing. No surprises here. I’ve found that my lighter hair makes me look more pale, therefore a spray tan is necessary until I can enjoy the benefits of real-life sunlight.
6. You Worry About Your Partner’s Experience: Before you go through with it, you can’t help but wonder just how good your partner is. Is your stylist someone you can trust, or is this whole process going to be a hot mess? You don’t want your first time to be with someone who will botch the job and ruin all of your future experiences forever. You saw what happened to Frenchie in “Grease,” and that’s not gonna fly.
7. You Realize The Importance Of Post-Action Grooming Maintenance: Now that you’ve gone through with it, you really need to stay on top of your grooming game. Others WILL notice neglect. My stylist told me that I should not dare to even think about using any products that aren’t from the Oribe hair care line, so I stocked up. Good upkeep is crucial.
8. You’ve Got A New Pep In Your Step: Once it’s over and done with, you feel like an entirely new person. There’s a strong possibility you may burst out singing “I’m Every Woman” as you stroll down the sidewalk.
9. Sometimes People Can Tell, Sometimes They Can’t: You will become really used to hearing people say “There’s something different about you, but I can’t quite put my finger on it…”
10. It Gets Easier: The first time is hella scary, but after that, you’re good to go. The fear goes away, you start to know who you can trust and you test your limits. You’re a new woman in no time!