Dysfunctional Couple Of The Day: Husband Locks Wife In Shed For Singing “Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead” About His Dead Mother

If you’re single and hating it, let this supremely screwed up couple be a shining example of what you are NOT looking for in a relationship. UK couple Andrew and Beverly Salmon’s fight began when Beverly received a phone call from a man who Andrew suspected she was having an affair with. Instead of owning up to the affair, Beverly began to sing “Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead” on a loop, in reference to Andrew’s recently deceased mother.

Andrew should have taken the high road at this point, and responded with a simple, “Be gone! Before someone drops a house on you.” But instead of channeling Glinda, he went all Wicked Witch of the West on his wife, punching her, twisting her breasts, and locking her in a garden shed. Beverly managed to escape out the shed’s window (without the help of a Scarecrow, a Tin Man or a Cowardly Lion) and found her way back into the house where the fight continued.

Andrew was arrested and pled guilty to domestic assault, claiming that he was suffering from depression, telling police:

“I was provoked, but I am sorry for what I have done to my wife and regret everything I did…She never really got on with my mum or any of my relatives and when my mum died she was horrible and offered me no support – she was extremely unsympathetic. She would sing ‘ding dong the witch is dead’ from time to time and didn’t even come to her funeral. It was a really difficult time for me and my family.”

Simply put: Yikes. [Daily Mail UK]