Life Dream Status: Red Robin Debuts Wine Milkshakes

Red Robin will always hold a special place in my heart. It was the most affordable “fine dining” establishment in the suburb a few miles from my small town high school, which made it the go-to place to celebrate birthdays, volleyball wins, SAT scores, and System of a Down CD releases. I spent many late nights there with friends, eating bottomless steak fries and chicken Caesar wraps while discussing boys who would never love us back. So many of my fondest teenage memories are set in a Red Robin booth. I stopped going there because I grew up, and also because of that one time my mom thought she was biting down on a particularly stringy onion in her Whiskey River BBQ Burger, only to realize it was a large clump of human hair.

BUT Red Robin might have found a way to win me back as a customer with an exciting new menu item: the wine milkshake.

What is this divine creation, you ask? Well, it’s called the Mango Muscato Wine Shake, and it’s made with wine, vodka, mango puree and vanilla soft serve. You’ve gotta admit that sounds kind of delicious, no? If you’re shaking your head disapprovingly right now, it might be because you don’t fit into Red Robin’s target audience for the Wine Milkshake: 45-year-old soccer moms who have had a hard day. (No, seriously.) Says Red Robin’s Chief Marketing Officer Denny Post: “For a mom to enjoy a wine shake with a burger is reasonable — and fun. It won’t be one of our highest-selling item, but there will be people who love it.”

Does it make me a frazzled soccer mom at heart if I really, really want a wine milkshake? No matter. I might have to hit up one of the 4 Red Robin locations within 30 miles of my house to try this culinary wonder. Will report back with my findings ASAP. Cheers!