Breaking News: I Am Pretty Sure This Is Not A Photo Of Lindsay Lohan’s Nipple

Aw, Internet, you’re so cute sometimes, like when Lindsay Lohan posts a topless photo to Instagram and you start seeing nipples where there are none. Adorable, right? Or is that delusional? Not sure. Blurred lines, there.

But I am fairly certain, like 99 percent (my eyesight is pretty poor, after all), that there is just no nipple to be found in this picture, which is more than I can say for Perez Hilton, Gossip Cop, The Hollywood Gossip, and multiple other such “news outlets,” all of which jumped the gun on the breaking-news “LINDSAY LOHAN’S NIPPLE!!!!!!” headline. No nipple here, you guys, just a touch of areola! Trust me, I’m an expert. [Crushable]