Dear Eric (or do you prefer to be called “Mean Melin”?),
I just watched your performance at the 2013 Air Guitar World Championships in Finland, and all I can say is: wow. You’ve got some serious moves, dude. Everyone knows that dating a musician is the worst, but since your instrument is imaginary, I think you might be an exception to the rule. I play a pretty fierce air saxophone, if I do say so myself. Maybe we can jam sometime and see where this goes?