In what was potentially an all time low for Walmart shoppers, one man decided that the best way to tell a woman that she was attractive was to throw bodily fluids at her. A Delaware police report obtained by The Smoking Gun states that Frank J. Short first walked past the victim and said, “Excuse me.” The 20-year-old victim “suddenly felt something wet on her buttocks, thigh, and leg.” At first she figured he had sneezed or coughed on her, but she soon found a “gooey glob” of something below her knee. This is what led her to believe that the fluid may have been semen. Ewww, please, no.
Short then proceeded to follow her around the store so persistently that she was forced to take refuge in an Employees Only area. The woman was then escorted to the security office while the police were called.
Oddly enough, Short’s story was not very consistent while he was talking to the police. He first told them that he must have accidentally flung some mucus on her while he was sneezing, but then changed his story to say that he threw his own spit at her because it gave him a “thrill.” While it is still not clear what the bodily fluid was, I can only hope it was spit. Because that’s somehow better than semen.
Short is now being charged with offensive touching with bodily fluid, harassment, lewdness, and disorderly conduct, according to CBS Philly.