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The 9 Most Totally Awesome ’80s Workout Videos

"I wonder if this is how Michael Jackson got started!"

Let’s travel back to a time when aerobics was a lifestyle and spandex was a religion. When there was no shame in wearing a fashion belt as an exercising accoutrement, and there was a fine line between working out and making a soft core porn. Man, the ’80s were awesome. We’ve collected of our favorite 80s workout videos to get you pumped for your health! First up, Alysssa Milano’s classic 1988 teen workout vid, “Teen Steam,” wherein Alyssa and a couple of her gal pals de-stress from parents and boys with a little bedroom workout. I’m pretty sure I used to have the VHS of this.

Plus, eight more vintage vids after the jump!

I like to imagine they filmed this in sunroom of Merv Griffin’s Hollywood Hills manse.  I mean, where else would they be, right?

Look closely. Do you recognize the guy starring in this video? The weird older man who just happens to be hanging out with a bunch of kids at a fun house? That’s J.D. Lang, who’s made an entire career producing some of the most insane/offensive/enjoyable reality TV programs — stuff like “The Pickup Artist,” “Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition,” and “Breaking Bonaduce.” In short, this man is a god to reality TV. Watch him as he and his child pals do the “swamp stomp” with Jane Fonda, of course.

Mix two parts exercise video with one part porno, and you’ve got “Heavenly Bodies: Hope of Beverly Hills.” Hope may not be all that coordinated, but she is very, very fit, and working out “turns her on.” So. Apparently this was a whole series of hot chicks from around the world, exercising in their underwear out on the divan.

I guess there was a whole fascinating crossover sector of porny soft-core exercise videos in the ’80s. Here’s one from Linnea Quigley, who starred in a bunch of B-movies. Her best line: “How do you know when to stop? When you feel like you’re going to throw up.”

Ladies, don’t forget to workout your face!

And this workout video just sounds like a porno. You can check out their dick-thrusting “stomach workout” here.

I guess in the ’80s they used to broadcast an annual Crystal Light aerobics competition, where everyone wore their finest leotards and spandex and teamed up to represent their local aerobics establishment. It was epic. I have never been this excited about exercising. I have never been this excited about anything, actually, as the people working out in this video.

I would cut a bitch for one of those workout outfits. Hello, white fashion belts for aerobics? Genius.

Workout Paul Ryan
Nice biceps, bro. Read More »
Workout Music
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